Are You A Menace?

Do you drive a motorhome?

Do you drive a piece of junk vehicle that isn't capable of going any faster than 60 km/h?

Are you so old or blind that you have trouble seeing over the steering wheel?

Are you so stupid that you cannot understand the basics of driving?

If you answered yes to one or more of those questions, then YOU ARE A MENACE ON THE ROAD!

First, are you the motorhome driver?

You are BIG and you are SLOW! You should only be allowed on the road between midnight and 4 am. You should have to pull over everytime there is a vehicle behind you, and let them go by. You hold up traffic and are generally obnoxious. GET OUT OF MY WAY!

Do you drive the piece of junk that can't go any faster than 60 km/h?

Your vehicle should be donated to a charity that can raise money by having one of those "pay 'x' amount of dollars to smash this vehicle with a sledgehammer" fundraisers. Then, as punishment, you should have to give me your driver's license so I can stomp on it and then set it on fire. GET OFF THE ROAD!

Are you old or blind?

HELLO! YOU CAN'T SEE WHY THE HELL ARE YOU DRIVING? USE YOUR BRAIN MORON! And if you are too senile to use your own brain, hopefully someone who isn't will take away your license and sell your car. Shouldn't you be in a home or something?

Lastly, are you the stupid one?

You are too stupid to drive. Since teleportation has yet to be invented, you must walk, take the bus or hitchhike. You do not deserve to have a driver's license and should have to get a big "S" tattooed on your forehead so that no one ever gives you one by mistake.

If you answered yes to more than one of the questions, you should be tied to the road and run over repeatedly. You are not only a menace to the road, but also a menace to society. IF YOU ARE A MENACE, STAY OUT OF THE DRIVER'S SEAT!

Did you find this lesson helpful? Why not check out all of my DRIVING FOR MORONS lessons ~ and remember folks, DRIVE SAFELY!